Saturday, July 11, 2009

Some Funny Tweets in Twitter

These days I have become a great fan of twitter. I was introduced to twitter a few months back but I really understood the power of twitter during the elections to the Indian parliament. I followed the entire counting of votes in twitter and saw for myself the clout of twitter. Since that day I am using twitter extensively and now I have over 600 people whom I am following, over 600 followers and have done over 1100 updates.

If you are not into twitter I suggest you also join twitter and fully enjoy the reach of twitter. If you are a novice this article will give you an idea about twitter and how it works. The key in successfully using twitter is selecting the right people to follow based on your interests. If your interest is in cricket only but all the people you follow never follow cricket then twitter is not that fun. On the other hand if you have around 100 people whom you follow is very much interested in cricket as you then it is a lot of fun in twitter. I am interested in the political and other news of India and almost every one I follow are also interested in these topics. Almost all the “hot news” that happened recently, I came to know through twitter only.

Some times the tweets of the people you follow can be funny and make you laugh. Here is a collection of some of the funny tweets I got from the people I follow on twitter.

Why did Pinky put lipstick on her head? Because she wanted to make up her mind

Why are teddys never hungry? Because they are always stuffed!

Why did the pregnant couple go to Pizza Hut? Cos they said 'Free Delivery'.

There are three stages in a man's life: Tri-Weekly, Try Weekly andTry Weakly.

Girls want a lot of things from one guy. Conversely, guys want one thing from a lot of girls.

Height of shame: you are running towards a wall with a full erect penis and.... your nose hits the wall first.

A foreigner walking down chowpatty sees a sexy hijda.He asks-''r u a prostitute?''. Hijda replies-''no Darling.I'm a substitute''

Height of Kanjoosi: A Bania's house has caught fire & he is giving missed calls to the Fire brigade.

Two words from Sanskrit that are strikingly similar, CHITA & CHINTA. One burns the 'DEAD' & the other burns the 'LIVING'.

How can you drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it? A.Concrete floors are very hard to crack!

Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in mother in law, they come out to Woman Hitler?"

There are only two four letter words that are offensive to men -'don't' and 'stop', unless they are used together

Having sex is like playing cards - if you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand.

Examiner: Tell me the name of this bird by seeing its legs only? Santa: I don’t know. U fail, what's your name? Santa: see my leg & you will know

Destiny is sometimes a jewel or very cruel. When its a jewel, wear it with humility & when its cruel, bear it with all your ability.

Middle age is when the broadness of the mind and the narrowness of the waist change places.

Now for people who can understand Malayalam

Karunakarante pocket adichathu aara?...................................... Tailor.

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3 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Good stuff. There are also a bunch of funny tweets at

http://funnytwitterstatus.blogspot.com

December 05, 2009 9:59 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

There was this one person (treythepandaxd) that simply said Fucking.Gophers.. I still laugh at that one xD

January 01, 2010 5:59 PM  
Anonymous Elixir said...

If you want more funny tweets, you should check out

http://funny-tweets.blogspot.com

November 14, 2010 4:00 AM  

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